Feelings..Thoughts...

The past few weeks have been quite a ride...highs and lows...

I have not idea what i wanna say but i have these feelings that need to be expressed....
Last night...i met up w my bestfriend...i didnt know she was goin thru what she had been for years....i felt how she felt...you know.. when she feels sad, i feel sad too...sometimes i wish that i could just be more comforting in terms of.. ha.nvm.. dun wanna explain...anyways...
we were actually looking around to help her decide her plans for her anniversary...we had dinner...then we headed over to chijmes...we were at "le baroque"...sitting and chillin out...its a new place...anyways.. we sat and talked....and thats when she shared this with me....
I appreciate that she could share it with me..and somehow as she was sharing her feelings and thoughts...about her life, i had this feeling that made me feel that shes someone really special that came into my life...there were somethings that she shared about her plans and what how much she's putting her time and effort in her current relationship and family that now at this point makes me see another side of herself as well as the special someone she has got...i am really impressed by her strong will and character....its a good feeling... and i am really happy for her..i really am...now i see the reason why she feels the way she does..and it somehow clears my doubt on certain issues...i guess as a friend, i was concerned about her plans for the future...i didnt want her to get disappointed or hurt in anyway...but i thought to myself..."wow, she's a lady who has a heart of gold that gives so much for those he loves..." i just took a back seat and pondered...i was glad that she shared it with me...i didnt know she was goin thru so much...i mean i knew what she was going thru but the degree it was it...it must ve been so hard for her... i'll pray for her...

anyways, it wasnt all for the night...i met up with an ole sch mate back from braddell...same year... it was nice to chat for a bit.. we headed to jln kayu...haha.. he introed me to a new place called Jerry's..we didnt head there just yet.. said he'd treat me to the buffalo wings the next time round..i cant wait to try it though.. maybe i'll take some friends there to chill out...check out the place..anyways....it was nice..i had prata..and teh tarik...he just had a teh chino..haha well... i found out some things about him...his character...it was good..we headed home...he drove me home...was a good short time spent.. :)

one more thing that happened during this day was...my ex called...feels weird saying that..a friend called..hahah. much better...anyways...i was happy...i was...its weird...but a good feeling...its like he just lights up my days...i dunno what it means...but like how i was sharing in my last blog...things have been different... a friend told me something that i didnt see it as that or maybe i just didnt want to think about as yet...but it got me thinking...we talked thru it...and i was honest with myself...i was.. it like when i am aound this friend of mine..i could be open and honest with how i feel..i guess hvaing gone thru what i did.. i have changed..and im happy that i have changed...i thank my Love for that...anyhows, somehow i felt that feelings is something that we can hide and sometimes cannot hide sometimes cos it just shows....and can be felt...by others too...
I said ive let it go..and i have...i did...somehow recently, between the point of knowing and realising...it could be coming back...but i know for sure that things are different and will be different...long story...

But anyways..he called.. we spoke.. i actually msged him la.. asked him what his address was so i could mail him stuff..but i hope it does get there...haha.. i like sending letters and recieving them...hehe.. :) then he called..hahaha...
anyhows...we spoke for abit...i was having a subway sandwich at shaw house, lido...something that we had on our first date...he reminded me of it thou..hahaha..it was nice...it has always been nice and safe talking to him...it always made me feel better...haha.. oh oh...hahaha.. well...
i dunno...what life has to bring...just feel and be logical about what i wanna do with my choices and feelings in life...for everything there is hope for every tiny drop of hope there is love...and love takes life to places that we never thought possible...