Randomly Bothered....

Im kinda bothered by something and i wish to get it off my chest, whether or not anyone reads this...its an outlet to express how i feel without being judge immediately or whatever.....im just being irrational now...haha..

well, im kinda in thoughts....and maybe a little paranoid and all....hhmm...
What is love?? is a question that many can or cannot explain....i guess...you know what, i dont feel like talking about love....haiz...im just being blue today...

Yesterday was a so-so day for me....i had time to do my personal stuff and well, is looking wonderful...and i pray really hard that things fall into place....Guide me....i believe...

This morning, my colleague was so nice...she got me a chocolate cheese cake with raspberry! I love raspberries! and guess what im down with ulcers and a scalded tongue, cough and it doesnt help when im heaty and i get these 'boil-like' things on the tip of my tongue that just spoils my mood and appetite cos everytime i wanna eat something, it hurts...*sad* i live with it..im just complaining.. :) okok..anyways.. it was so sweet of her, she said she knows im really busy working hard and all and just thought she gave me something to encourage and spur me on... So sweet...it does make me happy...
SMALL THINGS make me happy....i am a pretty simple girl...easily contented...haha... but im a lady, so yeah, the saying goes.. ladies are complicated and yes, i do agree to a certain extent.. cos i do know when im complicated and of course know when im not...you may beg to differ but i know myself...

anyways, last night, i wanted to meet up with a special someone, but i was too tired and stressed out....i had these headaches for about a week! due to stress and my tense muscles....so i decided i needed to see a massage therapist, wanted to get some acupuncture done, but he said, not necessary cos my muscles are too stressed and stiff and it has to be done when muscles are more relaxed...not sure what exactly he meant, cos he spoke in mandarin and thats what i figured from what he was saying, if i asked him to explain further, i think id be like....hhmmm... OK....
hahaha.. anyways.. he also said it cant be done in such a short time...he gave me a massage and advised me...gave me some 'koyo' and medication for stress and muscle relaxant...told me to exercise and stretch more...and work less in front of the computer...but man...*hows* i need to remember...he said, it has been caused by years of stress...hhahaa.. i wonder why.... :) but well, i'l get over it....im a tough girl i suppose...i fell asleep at 10pm...so early!! i guess i just couldnt take it..body is over worked...its really stressful to be a teacher...i somehow just annoyed at people who think teaching is EASY!!! rubbish...maybe 10 years back yeah..but not NOW...many in the same boat will agree with me...its not easy! *dont compare* im not talking about you right now...unless you've been in this line..you'll understand.... :) so just chill...im just being irrational again...hahahahhaha...

Oh, where was i, got carried away...haha...special someone, he was so concerned for me, i ws touched....*aawwww* we msged for alittle... then somehow, i just felt like it became different...im not sure but yeah, that was how it was....i was cool about it...gave it litte thought...but later more thought...haha.. and well, then i came alittle insecure, well, maybe i was concernd about my heart being let down for a while...psychoed myself alittle and tried to relax....i didnt meet up with him...
not sure if he wanted to...he didnt sound like he did...*pout* i guess for those who know me well, they know i dont usually go out during weekdays...really i dont...and if i do, you mean something to me OR i just really need a break and YOU help me do that...may reasons la actually to thin of it...depends..if i feel like it...i will.....well, i guess, we'll never know or you'll never know unless you find out for yourself yeah....*shrugs*

Anyways, i was reading, and while doin so, i just felt disconnected...trying to feel or understand what is being written and expressed but i just couldnt...i could then i got lost while trying to do so...my head while reading, had this movement that shook me, like i was dizzy for a split second...it happens every now and then.. not sure whats the cause but i pray nothings wrong with me....hhmm.....

I just dunno what to share actually.....just kinda idling...alittle confused about things...and just wanna look at it positively....
maybe i dont show enough care or concern for someone, but that doesnt mean that i dont care or think less about that someone...okok.. dun wanna talk about this anymore...haha.. getting too hhmmm.....

anyways, im laggin behind so many weeks of lesson plans...haha.. even my submission to my Ps/VPs has not been submitted for like 2 weeks...sheesh.. what?? the funny thing is this...i created the Lesson plans weeks before, all i needed was to paste them in and submit it..just that i didnt do my reflections..and this kept me from submitting...hahaha.. well, not excuses....my responsibility...and here i am typing away.....

I dont go out weekdays, only weekends....know that...i have my reasons...and its got nothing to do with you......chill bro *cheers*

Better do whats more important....see ya...