Life's Purpose, A Miracle shared...Changes...

There's alot to talk about and relive...but guess we all have to stop somewhere to take a break and reflect so we can apppreciate the little things and better things in life and what and who we have in our lives... i believe things do happen for a reason.. you may not find the reason at that point of time of the event..but eventually...maybe you'll find out years later when something else happens...and you reflect and realise that..hey, yeah..things are fallin into place for a reason..and now i see it..for example, my family...like my brother...he wasnt really planned by my parents to be brought into this world...we realised now(not that we didnt realize back then, just seems more evident and reinforced our reasoning NOW...)

A MIRACLE happened(8 years ago) id like to recall, a life and death event for my brother..what he saw and experienced while he was in a coma for 10 days, what we were "tested" for as a family...he was god sent for a reason...only until recently we,the family, realized why he was brought into our family/lives...and the things that he went through in the past and recently(my brothers' encounter spiritually)...how god was sending a msg to our family to bring us closer as a family as well as to God...you might think its all the the mind and out choices we make..yes, i do agree to some extent..but i guess you need to know the details of what we went thru as a family in the past as well as recently, that we made this realization...and it took us 8 years to find the reason(could be more reasons.. will wait and see what god has in stored for us).. so for those who think that God isnt at your side when you most need him or when you lose something or someone close to you or when something wrong happens that makes you upset or give up hope (to the extent of not believing in GOD..for some people that is...) I just have something to say, GOD WORKS IN Mysterious ways and the Wonders that he has planned out for you...he sees everything, he tests and give you choices...to serve and work with him...so that you will be with him when your time comes to know him personally...

i didnt used to be very spiritually bound, i mean, i believed in god and all, just that i didnt feel that...hmm...my heart wasnt totally spiritually ready to commit fully, i still don't think i am.. but im slowly bringing him in to my life...and to serve him...and i feel its good...i remember when i was at a prayer and praise session with my family and about another 20 people (siss' colleague-friends,...etc..a mixture), singing and all, i was consumed with many emotions...relief, pain, sadness, guilt, joy, forgiveness, having myself vulnerable to different emotions..inviting god in my heart and life...i teared non-stop at times when singing the songs of praise...it felt good...i was still holding back alittle..(cos i don't like people to see me emotional or cry when it comes to my personal life..like spiritual or hhm...guess its just an ego thing or my pride... i came to realize few months ago or more aware that i have quite abit of pride, ...thats what hinders me in being more open with certain people or situations even to my beliefs and personal interactions) but it was a feeling thats hard to describe...sometimes, i just want to cry it out(not out loud thou..just tear continuosly without anyone around to see me vulnerable to express the emotions i feel, the way i would when im crouched up in bed like a baby in the mothers womb..feeling safe with myself...being alone...with God...

These changes in life and experiences that ive been thru makes me the person i am today... being more open to changes and believing that things will work out the way it is "planned" for us so that we serve god and his people...to make this place, called earth, a better place to live in, to be filled with unconditional love....May the Lord bless and touch the hearts that need the love and care it needs to serve others and be loved themselves...